Saying those vows

Before, continued

Simply because these really make me smile!

Some of my most vivid memories are of my

time with my dad before the ceremony. Once

everything started, he and I hid in the grandest

of theaters (pictures to come) near the most

ornate stage. He was chatting and I kept going

back and forth between chatting back and saying,

"Sorry daddy but I really can't talk right now!"

And then he would just smile and nod his head.

I kept asking him to peak out and see if everyone

was there, yet. And then we prayed together.

And then my dear Brian stuck his head in the door,

just like he said he would, to tell me I could come

wait in the hall. Everyone had arrived.

Before we were wed

I have declared this week "Love Week!"

Yesterday was our quarter-of-a-year anniversary!

And in a few days, it will be Valentine's Day.

The truth is, we got our wedding pictures back

just two weeks after the wedding. We. love. them.

But we've kept them to ourselves for a little while,

and as family and friends continue to ask to see them...

I will deliver.

Our photographer is a dear friend and we are

so thankful that she blessed us with her talent!

So without further adieu, I'd love to share our

blessed morning with you.

Jake was very adamant about not wanting to see

me before the ceremony. I love his romanticism.

I almost couldn't stand the separation because

everyone kept telling me,

"Jake is SO nervous" and I wanted to run to him

and soothe him. But I didn't. It was really fun to

have our attendants help us move about the building

without seeing each other, it was like we were spies!

Jake's entourage:

My entourage:

And how did I feel that morning? ...

*A teeny note: I've edited a few of these photos for the sole purpose of imagining how we might like to crop them for our wedding album. I have zero skills with photo technology, these pictures are first and foremost the creative work of our dear friend and photographer. I want to be clear because I don't want to ruin her work... I'll probably be going to her very soon for professional advice, but if anything looks off for now you can blame me!

Lockdown

It's funny what you think matters when you're in high school.

I didn't make it into the top choir--the coveted singers--so I

was in the second-best choir for two years.

And I was always certain I'd be thought as and remembered

by my less-than-perfect place in the caste system.

Disregard the love I held for my own choir and director, I was

utterly ashamed for failing to make it to the top.

Anyway, you know who did make it to the top?

My best friend Olivia.

Olivia exceeds at absolutely everything she tries.

That especially goes for music.

So she was the queen and I, her faithful jester.

Olivia picked up the guitar, snowboarding, singing (oh the

singing! she sang at our wedding, you know), chemistry,

math ... and countless boys vied for her heart.

I felt inferior to her talent, but in friendship we were equals!

In our friendship we are mutually creative, mutually goofy,

and mutually supportive. We like almost all of the same things.

We think differently but complimentary.

And sometimes our choirs would practice together.

During one rehearsal the school held a lockdown drill.

Where a fire drill is protocol for a fire and a tornado drill for

a tornado, the lockdown drill comes in handy when someone

shows up to school with a gun in their coat.

So we fell to the ground and our teacher hit the lights.

Olivia instinctively handed me one of her earbuds and played

this song (Gong) from her iPod.

We lay there in the dark, one ear down to the carpeted

cement floor and one ear up, cradling the music in it.

I remember the world falling away.

Never mind the twenty other students in the room.

I was with my best friend,

listening to the best song in the world,

in the dark.

I love this memory. It's perfect.

I remember smiling big.

for the same day on which the Science Times is published, the library had too many books with my name on them.

... i promised myself I'd read more for school this semester, which includes these three books.
so now is when i say farewell to any world that does not exist in ink and page.

PS: i had to give a speech on the "collage of who i am" today and i shook like a leaf.