"this is my Father's world

... Why should my heart be sad?"

The voice of my colleague, brother, neighbor, singing next to me.
His deep, seasoned life supporting every syllable sent me home with these thoughts.

From a week about inclusion in our movement.

For me, it boils down to this: We need each other.
People of the world, from different backgrounds and life stories need each other. It sanctifies us to be close with people who are different than us. And beyond the conflicts of difference (or sometimes interspersed with them) there is rejoicing and completion. Why? Because it reminds us of home ... heaven. The book of Revelation tells us that heaven will be full of rejoicing, not monocultural rejoicing, but a party that represents every corner of the world.

But yes, there are conflicts. Obstacles sometimes. Propellers at others. But especially in my background (white suburbia) conflicts are obstacles. In my background, difference is troublesome, that's what we learned in the 50s and 60s. So we don't talk about difference, we talk about how we're all basically the same. A half-truth in my opinion.

So ... what if conflict never had a negative connotation?
Can you imagine?
What if we rejoiced in conflict because it enlightened us and it unearthed the truth?

I learned this wonderful analogy of driving. In the west, we drive with lanes painted on our roads. Everyone is expected to follow those rules. And if they don't, they get honked at. But in places like India, where the are no lanes, you have to honk to let people know where you're going. Honking is helpful! This makes me laugh because it's so true. For my people, noisy interjections are startling correctors. For other people, noisy interjections are proactive responsibilities!

So which one is right?
No.
Both and.
We need each other.

Because I don't know who I am without learning who you are. I don't know I'm a sinner unless Jesus came to save. I don't know that I prefer driving with lanes painted on the road until I hear that in some places there are no lanes. And personally, deeply, I've learned so much about myself--what to celebrated and what to redeem--in the context of a diverse community in partnership.

If heaven is home, and heaven is to be sought first, and if heaven is coming to earth, and if heaven is a party of sanctified, diverse people. Let's get the party started.

"The Lord is King--let the heavens ring. God reigns--let the earth be glad."

Home Streets

I've been thinking (struggling really) a lot about safety and street smarts of late.
I'm asking everyone I know how they approach it.
When we moved the whole four blocks to our new, more permanent home, I saw way more families out and about even at night time. It made me feel safe. I always felt fine here in Rogers Park. But if these women around me feel comfortable enough to take a walk with their three children when it's dark out ... well then I should too!

When a place becomes your home, your feelings change.
I am proud of this street. This block.
I don't want to be afraid and I don't want others to fear.
The Lord is my Shepherd.

A scary incidence did spur on this thinking, though.
A reminder that things happen.
But honestly, I'd rather they happen here, on a block with a hundred other people, than out in the country where I'm miles from another human.

Well, we moved ...

Our new place is about twice the size of our beloved studio. It's still in Rogers Park. Thanks to a miracle of God, we bought our first home. We're serious about investing in this neighborhood. I'm eager to see how owning property here will affect my feelings about our surroundings. I've been homesick for our studio a few times, I lived there more than two years, and Jake lived there almost two years. It's good to still find a home in the company of my darling man.

We got a Nikon. It was a miracle of timing. I'm still learning how to shoot in manual mode but I think I've got it! Thanks to all my friends who shared their knowledge acquired from expensive tuition with me (for free). I can't think of a more photographic neighborhood than our own:













Sometimes, I think justice is rightfully appreciating the beauty that already exists.

How can possibly say what happened?
It was magical.

On our way to the beach this week, I was mourning a little. Mourning the loss of some excitement and passion to pursue "greater things" in our neighborhood. I haven't done anything to seek justice among my neighbors in a while. We're trying to build a more permanent life here, but it's been a bumpy road.

Just before arriving at the beach, I looked up into the second story window of a familiar building. This window has a jungle of orchids facing out year-round. They look like little grannies to me, all bunched close, peeping down at the sidewalk. I imagine them gossiping about everything they witness.

And then I saw this:

right in front of that building.
It made me happy to think someone else is proud of our neighborhood.


We had a delightful dip, and started walking home.
THEN, I saw a man with glasses watering the garden in front of that building where the orchids live. He smiled enough to beckon a wave, so Jake and I waved at him.
"How are you doing," he asked, as if we were old friends.
And the conversation went from there, so natural and sweet. He was so friendly! We learned that he grows the orchids for fancy hotels and condos downtown. And when they are done with the flowers, he brings them home. We learned that he's lived in that building since the 90s. I can't imagine what it must be like to have seen all the change in Rogers Park in that time.
We were joking about going swimming, "Humans need to be watered too," I said, and he laughed.

Then, we thought he was inviting us up into his place to see the flowers. But he took off running and came back down with three orchids for us! To keep.

I can't put words to how wonderful it is to meet your neighbors.

The gifted orchids are really symbolic to me, because I was just starting to feel like a bad plant-mother for nearly killing our palm tree. And I was feeling bad about not living the life of bringing God's Kingdom to our neighborhood 24/7.
Maybe God has more hope in me than I do. That would be spectacular.

Where I've Been | Picnic Edition



I love the park and beach in Rogers Park. I love knowing my neighbors. And when my passion for this neighborhood was ramping up, I realized I know a lot of stellar people in Rogers Park. They just need to meet each other. Because the more you know your neighbors, the safer and nicer your neighborhood is. Right? So I started this little shindig to get people together, hopefully a couple times each month this summer. What's better than food, friends and the great outdoors (even when you're exhausted from the previously reported trip to Iowa)? Nuffin.










Especially when things look this good.

I've taken on pie as a hobby.



Dreaming it, making it, baking it, sharing it, eating it.
It's a beautiful thing.
There's really no telling when I'm going to bake.
Sometimes I just find myself on a Sunday night whipping my first ever batch of meringue.
And sometimes I find anise extract at the store and invent a pie in my mind
(then Google the recipe for it which I know probably exists), and begin.
These two have made their way into my heart, time and life lately:
Banana Meringue Pie & Pear Anise Pie.
Both with a new crust recipe which was a gem to work with.







I'm going to try and make a deep correlation here, between baking and my "greater things" mantra, okay? Follow me.
They are quite parallel things, making a pie and making a community.
They take imagination, work, patience and are practically useless unless utterly enjoyed.
I'm always the baker who eats a piece fresh fresh fresh out of the oven.
Always burning my tongue.
Never learning my lesson.
It's exciting to eat hot, but pie usually doesn't hold together well until cooled.
Maybe the same goes for community, especially new and diverse community?
It's an exciting thing to discover, but if we maul it hastily, it crumbles.
We risk exoticism and shallow consumption.
Both are necessary, I think, excitement and stability.
But overall, what's needed is respect. And sharing utter enjoyment with others.

Thanks for going there with me.
Have I got you dreaming about pie?

Here's the last thing about me being white.
I am angry about it.
I'm angry that wherever I move, I'm bringing more white people with me.
I'm angry that I have many more opportunities and resources than my neighbors.
I'm angry that I thoroughly enjoy my privilege.
I get so angry on those days when I see children who can only walk to the convenience store on the corner to eat a bag of cheetos for dinner. So angry when I hear of children being harassed on their way to and from school. They didn't ask for that. And I didn't ask for better.
On those days, I pray from the angriest part of my heart,
Jesus please come back now and just save us all. I'm done watching this horror.

But what amazes me,
is that each day we wake, God is telling us that we're not done yet.  Each day we wake up, God is ready to do more work to renew His creation, and His plan is to use people to do it.



This song and these lyrics put me in my place.

What good would I be doing to reject my privilege? At least in the sense of the influence I can have in local politics. If my ethnicity is favored and authorities listen to me ... and if I have no fear when talking to authorities ... then I need to use these gifts to speak on behalf of others. Because some of my neighbors don't trust the law, and some of them wouldn't be given the time of day. I dare not throw away such a valuable gift that could bless others.

This was the most inspiring and question-producing lesson I learned at CUP.
I have no idea how to advocate for my neighbors needs. But I have to learn.
God made all people in His image, all people have dignity. It is horribly wrong when local authorities do not grant some people equal dignity. In order to truly reflect God, we all need each other to be included in the picture.

We all need each other. That's the brilliance in it!
I was talking with a friend of mine about her moving into a black and how she feared she wouldn't be able to advocate because she herself is black. But we both realized that her ethnicity and cross-cultural friendships are necessary to build trust between neighbors of different cultures. We all need each other. That's why it doesn't do anyone any good if I despise my ethnicity and privilege.

No more white people pretending they aren't white, I say.
Thank God for what He's given you and honor Him by enjoying it.
Own up and lend your gifts to the community.
And be willing to receive.

Being White. 2

The topic of gentrification reminds me that in general, there are ramifications for everything we do. I think this is particularly challenging for privileged people, because even if we live in a poor or under-resourced neighborhood, we can often afford the drive to another neighborhood to buy nicer things. I'm leaning over and over again from the people who inspire me that the vehicle for gentrification is money.

My friend (and co-worker) (and neighbor! she lives two blocks away) Rachel has inspired me to think deeper about the impact of our daily lives. I really love talking with her because she's been thinking in this direction much longer than I have, and she has the heart to see things through.

I'll always remember hearing the Walmart reps in Food Inc. say that it's not hard for them to decide to sell organic products if that's what the customers want. We truly are voting every time we make a purchase. Any purchase! So I'm voting local, organic, and pro labor rights.


Now is a really good time for Jake and I to start practicing ethical consumption,  because our budget is so simple. Here's where our money goes monthly: - rent - donations/ tithing - groceries - public transportation - car insurance - gas - cell phones - health insurance
The basics. Right? So before we get too grown up and have too many more complicated bills, we want to begin practicing ethical principles for buying.

Something new that I've been convicted about is how many resources I waste on clothes. I don't buy many new clothes, but it still seems silly to buy so many new things when there are great second hand stores to be found. I'm committing to not buying any retail clothing until the end of the year, it's very liberating to think about all of the resources we can save by recycling clothes!

Now about groceries ... our biggest opportunity to choose between local and non-local. Here's where I admit that I'm really spoiled and I have an awesome local grocery store where I can buy everything except underwear, clothes hangers, and beer. I've thought it through. We are committed to supporting them, so we've had to switch some of the brands we usually buy. I know everyone doesn't have this option, so I'm really thankful.

That's her on the left in all her glory. The most complicated line in our budget is definitely groceries. This is where we have the most freedom to support I've written before about how we decide to buy organic or non-organic produce.

I appreciate your feedback on this little journey of mine. Thank you all for sharing your thoughts. I'd love to hear more about what your neighborhood is like and if you have a resource like my heavily grocery store or not. Honesty, I don't know what I'd do without that place.

There's more to be said about gentrification, being white, and advocating for your neighborhood. Particularly when it comes to buying a home, I hear. But I'm keeping these thoughts within the realms of my experience.

What do you think about all of this? 
Am I off my rocker? 
Do you have a community that encourages you to invest in your neighborhood?

Resources:
Organic Buying
Labor rights
Why Humane is more important than organic milk.

Being white. 1

Oh, who likes that word? Not me. But for the sake of clarity, I am going to use it. I am white.

This means, as a grade schooler, my other white friends and I would ask and tell each other over and over again "what we were." Irish, Dutch, Native American, French ... I'm your typical caucasian mutt. And more. Being white means my culture is time-oriented, systematic, not afraid of authority, usually trusting of authority, and highly favored.

It's hard to distinguish these things coming from the majority and favored culture. It's difficult to narrow down what exactly my culture is. And while everyone's culture probably depends more on their own nuclear family, I love to hear more about the general distinctions and gifts of different cultures.

At the spring break trip that changed everything, I heard about the cultures of my brothers and sisters who are not white. Some shared that they are more people or event-oriented, and loyal. Some said they are ultra respectful of authority. And it's common for many of their cultures to distrust authority. It was good for me to hear from my friends, and to celebrate the gifts that their cultures bring to society and the church.

I also learned among giggles that camping and coffee shops are mostly white things.
This is the local place Jake and I frequent. The Common Cup:


Overall, I left wondering more about the impact my culture has on my church and neighborhood. And what to do with this new knowledge.

When I, as a single white woman moved into Rogers Park (I moved here before I was married) my neighbors noticed. And so did the local realtors. The color of my skin told these people that a privileged* woman feels safe walking around this neighborhood. Which might mean others like me would feel safe living here, too. My simple presence here influences rent prices and local business markets. (Am I more likely to support Whole Foods or my local grocery?) This is fact, because I am white, no matter what, no matter where I go. The only way to protect my neighborhood's diversity is to support those who are already here ... and that's where part two will pick up.

Can you distinguish your culture's unique traits?
What kind of an impact do you think your presence has in your town?
Where does your money go? 




      This is a complex subject that I know very little about, but I'm hoping to learn by speaking with others about it. What time would be wasted if I waited to be an expert before taking action? For more information about just gentrification, I've been suggested this resource: Gentrification with Justice by Bob Lupton. Would you look into this with me?

* I don't have a lot of money. But I have access, education, and favor among authorities. This makes me privileged. You only have to make 50k/year to be among the elite in the U.S. I will continue to refer to myself as privileged as a pure reminder to myself.

Roll call.

Who and what is here?

If there's one big takeaway I can already claim from the spring break trip that started it all, it's the inspiration to keep my eyes wide open. Every street, every building, every neighbor has a story, and we can learn from them all.

Our current world--and the relationships among its people and environment--does not reflect God's original design. But it all leans in longing for redemption, and I think we can learn something from the direction of its leaning. All people were made in the image of God so it's crucial that we include all people in our pursuit of God.

We live in Rogers Park, the northernmost neighborhood in Chicago, right along the lake. I've already learned a lot about it by living here since 2009. It's a truly fascinating community. Jake was afforded an inside look when he actually collected Census data in our neighborhood last summer! During his training, he learned that we have one of the most diverse zip codes in the nation.

According to the 2000 data, our community is 

31% white, 29% black, 27% hispanic, 6% Asian, 4% other. 

Those "others" include our many new immigrant neighbors, as our community is a major entrance city for foreigners.

But more than nationality ... Rogers Park has apartments, single family homes, nursing homes, a university with dorms, condos and hospitals! That's pretty stellar when you think about it.

While perusing the RPCC web site, Jake and I delved into this together. It's really revealing of the community. We were excited to see some familiar faces on the pages, and we definitely learned a few new things.

These people have tracked the attendance of whos and whats in our community for a while now:


I highly encourage all of you take a closer look at who lives amongst you.

So, do tell, who and what is in your neighborhood?

Greater things.

I have long heard about the racism and injustice that continues to exist in our world today. It continues in our own county, and even on my city block. But knowledge is only half the equation. It isn't the point to simply know things.

I had a life-changing experience last week when I joined my students on an urban project in an under-resourced neighborhood of our city. I heard the stories of people who experience racism and injustice daily. These people became my friends and I felt for them. I went in believing I should serve and aid others, and came out understanding that I need these people just as desperately. Because all people are made in the image of God.

It breaks God's heart when His creation fights with itself internally. It did not honor God when my friend M worked harder than any of the other waitresses and her boss made racial slurs toward her. It does not honor God when my friend L gets pulled  over on the same stretch of highway nearly every time she wears her hair natural and big, instead of relaxed. And it's not okay that this happens in our city.

God did not create the world to function in this brokenness, and I see the real ways He is working to repair our earth. I don't want to miss out on what God is doing to restore our city!

I want this blog space to be about waiting expectantly for the greater things that have yet to come. Because I long to see the day when there are no more tears on this earth, only praise.

I want to use this blog to inspire thought and emotion in others, most specifically in other white folks, because that is the experience I can speak from. And I deeply hope the conversation here inspires people of all ethnicities and cultures!

I need to use this blog to keep myself accountable and inspired. I need to use this blog to process what I am learning, hearing and seeing.

I need to learn more, and I need to feel more.

Will you do this with me?
Welcome to my neighborhood!