Never Before

Never before has the horizon been so clear.

Never before have I thrown myself into mystery with so much force.

The ocean is an endless, matte gem of periwinkle - the occasional barge blemishes it with business and direction.

Clouds hover in attempt to anchor as islands.

They too, are wanderers like me.

And then a giant promise forced itself into the sky, with it's snowy cap, to say I'm on the right track.

Examples of Faith

"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see."

Faith is one of those words that gets thrown at me more often than I can catch it.

I know I want to be faithful, I know faith is good, above all I know God is faithful -

but what in the world does that mean? Of course, it's probably nothing in this world.

"... without faith it is impossible to please God."

Okay, I get that.

This verse goes on to say that faith means people come to God because they believe that He exists and rewards those who come to Him. The rest of this chapter is an amazing list of things people have done in faith. Our whole history is painted by bold, faithful actions and I want to learn from them.

"They did not receive the thing promised,

only welcomed them from a distance."

This section mentions Abraham and Jacob, who were still worshipping God and encouraging others in their dying moments. These encouragements are the catalyst for a domino affect of faithful acts done by one person after another. So maybe I need to look closer at what God is doing in other people's lives to be encouraged and to see what I should do in response. I think I also need to take this part seriously because acting in faith requires a trust in God. It especially means not acting only because I think I will get what God promised, but because those who follow me might.

"By faith the people passed through the Red Sea, as on dry land...

By faith the walls of Jericho fell."

My prayer is that I may take on these stories as my past, as my history, as my example. May I follow and trust God so fast that each step I take is a step in faith. I don't know how to do all the things that He has called me to do, but I truly believe everything is better for it. May I act in faith so that someday I learn what it truly means, and so those coming after me may be better because of it.

"These were all commended for their faith, yet

none of them received what had been promised.

God had planned something better for us so that

only together with us would they be made perfect."

H11:1-2, 6, 13, 29, 30, 39-40

"And let us...

... consider how we may spur one another

on toward love and good deeds."

Hebrews 10:24

Inspiration comes to me in so many ways,

through scenery and people and quiet interactions.

How amazing would it be for God to use me

to inspire others.

If my life spurred others on toward love and good deeds,

I think I just might feel like I completed my mission.

While I sat on the bus, early this morning,

my shoulders were pressing against two strangers.

I hardly had peripheral vision because 

my two hoods cut off the sight, but

I could feel the spirit of all the people with me.

God loves them all so much,

everywhere I go I see God's children

and I am surrounded by His love for them.

How great would it be, to bless them back?

To use my single channel to God, among their millions, 

to somehow reach, inspire and love them.

Now comes time for consideration - how might I do this?

Foothills Still

This fall I was tempted with dreams of mountains

and in my hesitation I thought I lost my surroundings,

but my friend and mentor Erin suggested I might be in the foothills.

I know I am on my way,

but the big view is gone, I am ascending, I'm part of it.

Since then Erin has brought beautiful Stella into this world,

and I think I remain in the foothills.

It's hard to say.

I only catch glimpses of the grandeur, my eyes are in front of my toes,

sometimes they scale to my next camp

but I have no business there until I do everything I can here.

Wherever I am, Hebrews is my guide.

I read Hebrews 10, sometimes 9 or 11, everyday.

Those notes will hopefully follow in more detail,

I keep track in my more personal writings.

One thing I can say is I have found blessings upon blessings

in my friendships and family members.

The spirit needs connection and nothing teaches like loneliness.

I am so grateful.

For the means of communication

I have decided to include tales of the trails on this blog.

Everyday I grow father away from facebook,

but I would like to keep those who inquire in the know.

This will be simple, no frills,

and I am not trying to impress anyone.

Trust & Grace

Trust.

Grace.

Trust.

Grace.

God is throwing things at me. 

Scripture is coming from everything I encounter.

I was just writing how God is my steady, 

faithful rock and I want to be like that.

Then I thought maybe I would find what I am looking for in the Bible.

I thought maybe some Holy words would make a good mantra.

So I opened the page my pen was saving from last night,

and I read the passage I read last night.

It looked completely new.

"It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. 

Stand firm, then and do not let yourselves be burdened again 

by a yoke of slavery."

Galatians 5:1

I have here in bold what is underlined in my Bible.

I don't remember when I wrote this, but also above the word free it says TRUST.

That freedom is what I long to have, to feel.

There, I said it, feel. I want to feel like I am a Christian, I want to have Light.

I admit, it's getting a little tiring going through the motions without feeling it.

But I keep doing it because the first thing the enemy wants, and the last thing I will do

is give up.

This particular scripture being thrown at me

is significant because it's about my goal for the time being.

No resolutions, no promises, just hope.

Hope to learn what it means to really trust God.

Hope to see myself not work for what He has granted us, to accept His grace.

These are my trouble zones, TRUST AND GRACE.

I've already promised God to give up all of my worries about the future.

Opportunities in life often "parade as light" in front of me, and my tendency

to plan and figure turns into chains and the opportunities become consuming.

My hands are tied and all I can do is pray.

So I have promised God that when any hidden idea in my brain pops-up to

get me to worry or fret, I will pass it on to him and TRUST.

And GRACE. 

Grace will be when I stop jumping from plot to plot, in hopes of being

where God wants me, and accept that He just plain wants me.