This week I am wondering what it really means to be married.

Friday

9 am- I really like this girl. Many of my thoughts posted on here spin from our conversations at work. She is saying, "I'm an apothecary!" and giving me drops of elm and aspen.

Thursday

Noon- I'm finally staring to get good at making pie crust, this was my best one yet! Zach and Elspeth have something to look forward to!

Wednesday

8 am- Another inspiring morning with these amazing women,

and then Jake and I joined bank accounts.

Tuesday

3 pm- My coworker told me that I eat the plainest food.

"For you are great and do marvelous deeds;

you alone are God.

Teach me your way, O LORD,

and I will walk in your truth;

give me an undivided heart,

that I may fear your name."

Psalm 86 found me this week.

(so good!)

Faith

Today

8:30 pm- My soul needed some candles.

Sometimes, at the end of the day,

I can't believe myself.

Thank God, really, thank God

for grace.

I'm working on an opinions piece

for the paper, it's about faith.

I wish I had more.

I wish my faith was more severe.

"Jesus replied, I tell you the truth,

if you have faith as small as a mustard seed,

you can say to this mountain, 'Move from

here to there,' and it will move."

Matthew 17:20

Today

Noon- Picked up the rings. I'm astonished.

Then Jesus said to them,

"The Sabbath was made for man

not man for the Sabbath."

Mark 2:27

Today

11 am, My landlord turned the heat on! I made made my dad's tea blend and for the first time I saw a man in the abandoned apartments across the courtyard.

Friday

9 am, It is my belief that all Chicagoans become bagladies and bagmen.

Thursday

8 am, A very rainy day from my homestop on the el.

Wednesday

7 am, Our first pumpkin lattes of the season. They're so sweet I normally only get one a year, I probably look forward to it more than Christmas morning.

One picture a day.

For one month.

Thanks to a coworker who once

told me to try real sushi,

I now feel challenged to try this.

I love documenting life. It's true. I hope to someday look back and remember little details of life that might otherwise go forgotten... to wherever forgotten things go. So, as Wednesday was exactly one month away from our wedding, I decided to start a project.

Life in the questions

Out of the perfect storm of an increasingly disappointing column in our paper, my own expectations which said column does not live up to, my belief that a whole lot more could be done with that column, and a great conversation with my co-worker and friend--the question of time and purpose for questions.

I value tradition, I value the collected knowledge of centuries before us, I value questioning what you're handed and making it relevant to your life, I value what people believe and I want to hear it. I want to know what they really, truly, down in their gut, believe. I'm so tired of post-modern, self-created, empty religion. I'm not sure we have much faith in our world left--and my friend asks me if people can't just "be" if they can't find their purpose in the question.

I'm really not sure. As a person with so many questions, so much need to verify what I'm told, I still think questions are places of transition, not of settling. There is solid truth and my heart breaks for the people who settle for less. But she tells them to grant their beliefs, and I want to, but I want for them something deeper than constant questioning.