Hearing the Call

My job is incredible. I wake up in the morning knowing what a privilege it is to walk with people through prayer and reading holy scripture, or to walk with them and grab a milkshake.

I ask a lot of people a lot of questions. About their faith, about their doubt, about how their heart and mind is navigating it all. I follow-up on those conversations weeks later, so these people know they are remembered and that I care about their growth.

I do not fancy myself an expert. Mostly I think people just need someone to walk with them through life, more than they need answers. (Though I study a lot for the occasions when that would serve someone well.)

I would never desire that caring for others should feel like a job, but because it is my job, sometimes I find myself there. Ministering to people does not stop when I clock out. Not that I have a computer to clock out of anyway. Outside of my "9 to 5"... or 4 to 9, or 10 to 12 and 3 to 7 ... it's a part of my role as a sister, daughter, wife, friend and citizen to minister to many other people, without getting paid for it. And sometimes I get grumpy about that.

Sometimes, like one time in particular, which affected the darling man I married.
It's a beautiful thing that this blog is a record of where God has met me. I need this reminder often.
I always want to remember this time.

This time, we were driving home from a wildly successful weekend of ministry. Our exhaustion became more acute the closer we got to home. Jake was in need of some t.l.c. and I was tired from giving hundreds of people t.l.c. all weekend. Imagine some slammed car doors and long silent walk down the street under the evening mist.
     "Jesus, I think I did enough of your work over the weekend. Can't I pass on caring for Jake in this situation? I don't think I should be required to work after hours."
     "Taylor, your paradigm is backward. Doing ministry is not a job, it is a blessing. Caring for people can be life-giving, and I want you to figure that out, because I want you to stick with this work."

Just like that.
After asking God for four months if I should stick with InterVarsity beyond this internship year.

I will never cease to be amazed at how God takes very ugly moments in my life and my heart, and turns them into pure gold and wisdom.

What's In My Purse/Handwriting Game/blog glut!



I've been thinking about sharing this for a while, because it's pure comedy.
Imagine me, squeezed next to many neighbors on the train,
digging with little elbow room, looking for my lipstick and pulling out everything but.
I have quite a few essentials in my purse of relatively the same shape.
It's so difficult to get what I'm going for. But it makes for a good giggle.





Also,
I really love observing people's handwriting. So I jumped on this bandwagon.
I feel like I have no control over my handwriting, I wish I could make it prettier.

To do the same, I tagged ... Ashley Joy & Brennan & Dinosaur Toes.

The questions are: 1. what's your name and blogger name? 2. what's your blog's URL? 

3. Write, "The quick brown fox jumps over the lazy dog." 4. Favorite quote? 5. Favorite song?

6. Favorite band/singers? 7. Anything else you want to say? 8. Tag bloggers to participate.

Living with OCD is like living in a puzzle that must constantly be restored ...

and it is my responsibility to restore it because I know no one else sees the pieces,
let alone that the pieces are out of place. 

When I wake up in the morning, something “clicks” in my brain, the switch is flipped.
All of a sudden I am fully aware that the kitchen counter must be wiped,
the printer and speaker cables are facing in unparalleled angles,
the welcome mat needs to be shaken,
the floor must be swept,
our stacks of books are leaning too far,
I put a bag of brown sugar on the wrong shelf,
and there are too many shoes in our shoe basket. 

These things call me, beckon me to fix them. And they are so hard to resist.
Because everyone knows the weight of an unbalanced puzzle piece is tangible.

"When I tried to understand this,

it was oppressive to me

until I entered the sanctuary of God ..."

Psalm 73: verses 16&17

My controlling nature clearly communicates a lack of faith in God. I'm working on this.

Yann Tiersen!!!

That's how I feel when mentioning this musician. I first looked into him after hearing his work on the Amelie soundtrack, and began to appreciate his other compositions immensely.
Jake and I both had our birthdays in January {22 and 23} so Jake got us tickets to Yann's show which was coming to town. What a fabulous gift! The show was incredible! I might have embarrassed my friends a little by getting so excited--especially for this song:




That video is not from the Chicago show. I was too busy soaking in the live experience to take a substantial video. If you want to look further into Yann Tiersen's work, I highly suggest the albums Le Phare and Dust Lane.

Here is a great, blurry picture of some of the cute faces I know who also came to the show ... a photo of Yann himself who was difficult to capture ... and the final photo to show you what it looks like from a short person's vantage.

I've been sort of keeping my distance on this blog because I'm trying to figure out what to make of it.

Why do we blog? I don't know. For now I'm resigning myself to not knowing. Because I always end up coming back, for whatever reason. What I do know is that it's very entertaining to read other blogs, so I feel somewhat obliged to put my own stuff out there in return. And of course, writing is how I open the hatch and let these compressed thoughts come swirling out.

So other than blogging about blogging ... I thought I would get a little closer to this blog by doing one of those "things you may not know" posts on my blog. (I had to say blog one more time in that sentence.)

For inspiration, I asked Jake to tell me what to share. So here you have it.


1. I like the way skin smells in the sun. My Californian childhood afforded me the association of sun-warmed skin and good memories of family time outside. My own skin smells very similar to my dad's. I felt awesome the day I discovered that.

2. I refused braces.

3. I don't like to shop. It frustrates Jake because I'll stand at the entrance of a store, scan the room and walk away. Jake is much better at digging for gems. I should say that I really do love grocery shopping.

4. My dad built my bed. It's magical. Go to my old blog to see a photo. I designed the bed with my dad, he made it with such fine detail and without any metal, it's all wood. I am so proud of it, and proud of my dad. I am grateful. My bed is already an heirloom.

5. I drink skim milk because it has more protein than any other kind--even soy.

6. I sleep better when an alarm is set.


I hope that was fun for you to read. Was it?
What else should I blog about?